Is Your Ex Coming to Visit Your Child?
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The most important consideration is the child not you and your stirred up anxiety. Your child needs a relationship with their parent more than you need to resolve old feelings from the past. As long as you trust the parent to keep the child fed and safe from danger or abuse, be quiet and let their relationship be what it can be. Relax; think of your Ex more as a babysitter than a threat. Take the free time and treat yourself to good parenting rewards, like walks along the shore, a new shirt, a pedicure, a glass of wine or wheat grass with a friend. No matter how wonderful a parent you are, you are only capable of fulfilling fifty percent of your child's parenting needs. They need to know they are worthy and having a visit from an absent parent can mend a big hole in your child's heart. Let it be and wish your child the love of that parent. Your Ex may have abandoned and hurt the family and you may feel they do not deserve your child's love. However, your child deserves to feel loved by his or her parents as much as possible. Never say an unkind word about your child's parent. Kids see the truth, usually around twelve years old, anyway. Pray for that parent to get it before it is too late, to realize that a child's love is precious and valuable, never to be taken for granted or squandered. Miracles happen. Sometimes people do get wiser with maturity and time, even Exes. 
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author's Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health, Women's World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers and Menstuff. To purchase Matchlines book please visit: http://www.askdrmolly.com. To read Dr. Molly Barrow daily blog: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com.
©2008
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