27 Reasons Why Relationships Fail And What You Can Do To Avoid Them

Unhealthy, Sad Relationships have some general notable characteristics in common. Here are 26 basic guidelines for reference. They are not in order of importance.

Avoidance - Many people in unhealthy relationships simply avoid facing reality. There are many reasons for this. For instance, deep down inside, the people involved may be trying to make themselves appear superior. Or perhaps they don't want to face the fact that their mates really aren't who they say they are. For example, Person A might cover up and make excuses for his mate, Person B, who is always late coming home from work and almost always misses family functions. Person A could be trying to avoid reality and make up excuses to cover up an affair that Person B is involved in so that it doesn't destroy their "perfect image" in everyone's eyes. Or Person A could be avoiding the fact that Person B is a workaholic.

Burnout - Although many can carry out romance throughout their entire relationships, the actual honeymoon period does have to end, in reality. And those who can keep the "love" fires burning, not 24 / 7 but off and on regularly during their relationship, have better chances of healthier relationships than those who suffer burnout and don't know where to turn or who turn to unhealthy solutions. In short, every relationship has its highs and lows. During the low times, like maybe when one person begins to feel disillusioned with marriage, or maybe trapped, tired, helpless, depressed or let down, if this person reaches out to unhealthy alternatives, like getting a fake substitution - maybe seeking another mate in secret, getting "high," or some other negative behavior, once-healthy relationships can suffer. Instead, the couple needs to face issues together; add some new goals to the relationship, do some fun things together more, talk more, etc.

Compatibility Issues - Opposites attract; or do they? Sure it's great to have some "spice" in your life. But relationships are about getting your needs met - at least on some level. And constant negativity can certainly hinder intimacy. So those who have a difficult time focusing on what attracted them to their mates in the first place can suffer unhealthy, sad relationships, constantly in conflict over issues with which they can't agree. Check out the complete Love By Design System to find out if HE or SHE is the one for you today!

Devotional Void - A lack of commitment or ardent love can make for unhappy relationships. Being friends or roommates is one thing. Being committed, loving soul mates is another. Being "in love" 24/7 doesn't necessarily have to be a requirement, but being in a "loving" committed relationship can make the difference.

Enthusiasm Dwindles - If you don't add in some spice once in awhile, you can get the same old, same old. Couples caught up in routines can lose that spark of enthusiasm; i.e. zest of life in their relationships if they forget to be spontaneous once in awhile or forget to flavor their relationship with fun, adventure, romance.

Forgiveness Void - No one is perfect. Mistakes are a part of life. Those unwilling or unable to forgive, can pretty much count on having more unhealthy relationships over time. Relationships based or growing on anger, spite, disgust, resentment or other negative feelings associated with lack of forgiveness are like wilted flowers. They need tending to or they'll die.

Guise - Simulated relationships or those under the guise of having a solid, happy relationship are not destined for success, on the whole. Or rather false is as false does, as Forest Gump might say. Pretending wears thin and doesn't last long.

Harm - Harmful thoughts, words and actions can sure lead to unhealthy relationships. An occasional outbreak during a stressful moment might be considered normal like swearing; i.e. if someone hasn't been raped, battered (or other sever trauma has occurred) by the other party. However, harmful, violent actions such as those and repeated verbal negativity is abusive and not healthy in relationships - or life.

Indulgence - Instant gratification or indulgence of unhealthy behaviors is a sign of trouble. Grabbing chocolate to satisfy a craving is one thing. Grabbing illicit drugs or another mate in secrecy is another. Yielding to unhealthy temptations and desires is a pathway to unhealthy relationships.

Just say yes - Not being able to draw boundaries or sustain limits is another possible path to sad relationships. For example, if one person in the relationship has a difficult time saying "Yes" and setting limits, his or her mate could always come in second, third or forth - - rarely first in the other person's eyes and agenda. And while it's fine to take a back seat once in awhile, people make time for priorities and in healthy relationships, both parties feel and share the value of being number one with one another.

Kick the Dog - Kicking the dog, not in a literal sense (although that would be negative, too!) is characteristic of unhealthy relationships. For example, if a person comes home angry and passes this anger on to the dog by kicking it, that is not a healthy release of anger. The unhealthier people are, the unhealthier they generally deal with stress. Help is available.

Lemons - Unhealthy relationships often have at least one party who can't seem to make lemonade out of life's lemons. Maybe he or she has the wrong recipe. Or maybe the person is a bad cook. But assistance is needed in this department!

Management Mania - Remember the "Odd Couple?" A super manager personality can ruin an otherwise healthy relationship. Likewise a super sloth can wreak one, too. A little give and take is called for.

"Neverland" - Ever heard something this in an argument, "You never....?" Well trips to Neverland are for Peter Pan. Skip the "always" and "nevers" in arguments and avoid unhealthy relationship issues. It's rare that someone does or does not do something 100 percent of the time. Memories just seem to fail during opportunistic, stressful episodes sometimes (not always, though!)

Ominous - Bad or ominous feelings, an omen...a feeling deep inside that tells you something is wrong - this often accompanies unhealthy relationships.

Pressure - When one party pressures (or forces) the other to have sex, this is characteristic of an unhealthy relationship.

Questions - Part of communicating is asking and answering questions. If this process causes problems, i.e. even the simplest of questions arouses anger, suspicions, fighting, etc., this is a trait often found with unhealthy relationships. The party who has difficulty answering questions may be hiding something, dealing with control issues or dealing with substance abuse (or other).

Responds Inappropriately - Some characteristics of unhealthy relationships include playing head games, trying to humiliate, using threats, insults or jealousy. These inappropriate responses suggest unhealthy environment between the couple.

Silence - Silence isn't always golden, as the saying goes. If one person shuns or ignores the other, outside of a solitary or very brief occurrence, this can reflect an unhealthy relationship.

Treatment - If healthcare treatments are being ignored or stopped without the help of a professional; for example, in the case of stopping anti-depressant medication after a severe (negative) episode (like suicide), this can signal an unhealthy relationship. People need to take care of themselves and not leave everything up to their mates in relationships.

Untidy / Unkempt - When one or both partners disregards physical appearance for the duration (long-term, not just for a weekend), this signals an unhealthy relationship. One or both could be abusing substances, for example, or suffering depression.

Verbal Abuse /Violate - When one or both partners use verbal abuse and / or violate or cause harm to the other's person or personal property, things or friends, this can be a red flag for an unhealthy relationship. People should respect each other and each other's property, things and friends. And verbal abuse is not appropriate.

Weapons - Threatening a partner with a weapon, even if it's a household (or other) item used as a weapon is a sign of an unhealthy relationship.

Xerox - A trait of an unhappy relationship can be when a person is copying another, failing to be himself or herself. Some personality disorders are also characterized by this trait that reportedly shows up in a number of unhealthy relationships. And help is available.

Youthful Outlook / Emotions - An energetic, youthful attitude toward life is one thing. Youthful expectations; i.e. outlook, and emotions can be characteristic of unhealthy partners. Growing couples need maturity as they grow together and face adult issues. Childish displays of anger, hostility, selfishness, etc., don't have much place in healthy, growing partnerships.

Show All Articles By Cucan Pemo

Back To Article Index

Bring Back the Love of Your Life!

Discover how you can easily bring back the Love of Your Life! - A Potent 4-Step Strategy which always works! ... No matter how stubborn the resistance, no matter how far this person is from you, no matter how hopeless your situation appears!

• Is there someone out there who you care for more than words can say?
• Is this person currently in a relationship with someone other than yourself?
• Do you feel you will never be the same and will remain so unless the two of you are reunited - together at last in each other's arms?
• Are you certain the two of you are meant to be with each other?
• Do you feel alone, and worried that you'll never find another to love as deeply?
• Are you fearful you are running out of time?
• If the love of your life returns, will you truly be fulfilled, happy?

If you answered yes to most or all of these questions, you will never be satisfied unless you have done everything within your power to bring your true love back to you. You can do something now! Grab this book today and watch your love relationship improve! The results you want could happen quicker than you think!

Get 5 Free Ebooks with my Newsletter

Plus 4 more books

2: The Message Of A Master
3: The Best Places To Meet Women
4: Where Do Princes Come From
5: The Triggers

Sorry no AOL email addresses

Red Fields Are Required

Email Address

First name

Last name

What You ABSOLUTELY MUST Know About the Man You Like
To Attract Him, Capture His Heart, Grow His Love For You! -

You know you're in love with that hunk and you've felt this way for sometime now. You know he's just right for you and have had millions of dreams in which you share the most exciting, wild and highly romantic times. But when it comes to men, you really don't know what they want, what do they need, and you may ask: "What are they looking for in date?"

You may currently be in a relationsihp with a specific man, and you "know" he's the right one for you, but why do you still feel your life empty even with him around? You have a wealth of love stored up just for him, but why is he not loving you the way you want him to? Why does he appear so cold and distanced? Why has he changed after courtship?

Just what does he need and want?

Here's some if what you'll learn about the man you love in this awesome package:

• Do you know what he is looking for in a date? Do you know what are his innermost desires and thoughts? Do you want to know how to make him yours?
  
  
• Do you want to know what are some of the best methods you can take to approach him? Do you know what men are thinking when a woman make an approach?
  
  
• Do you know which part of a woman's body men put more emphasis on? Do you want to know what do men think about a woman with big breasts? Will he go for a woman with big breasts?
  
  
• What are men's inner thoughts, emotions, and true feelings about love , romance and relationships?
  
  
• Why do men always want to be right?
  
  
• Why does he appear to be so cold and distanced?
  
  
• Do you want to get him to pop the question? Getting a guy to commit to relationship or marriage is not impossible! I'll show you how.
  
  
• Do you know why your man doesn't like to talk about feelings and emotion?
  
  
• Do you want to know what is going on in his head when he asks to be left alone?
  
  
• Do you want to know what he thinks about you moving in with him?
  
  
• What does he look for in a "wife"? Do you want to know what you can do to get him to move towards popping the question?
  
  
• Why does he forget birthdays and anniverseries?
  
  
• Do you know what he thinks about marriage? Do you want to know what you can do to keep a long lasting marriage with him?
  
  
• What do you need to know about men in a sexual relationship with him?
  
  
• Do you know what is the one very important thing you must not say to your man if you want a committed and long lasting marriage with him?
  
  

Download 500 Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know!

What You ABSOLUTELY MUST Know About the Woman You Like
To Attract Her, Capture Her Heart, Grow Her Love For You!

If you're a single guy and you just can't understand how to get a date with a great girl, then this book is for you. Dozens of secrets revealed about what girls are looking for when they are out with their friends and on the singles scene, and what causes them to give a guy a second look-or even a phone number. You'll even get advice about how to ask a girl out on a date in a way that will make her swoon!

If you've already landed a great girl and you want to know how to keep her interested in you, this book is for you. You'll find everything you need to know in order to make your gal feel loved, respected and satisfied.

And if you've been dating the same girl for a while and are thinking about how to take the next step, look no further than this book! You'll find out how to know about what she's probably feeling and how to get her to commit to you.

Here's some if what you'll learn about the woman you love in this awesome package:

• Do you want to know what a woman looks for in a date? What turns her on?
  
  
• Do you know what a woman want and need so that you can ensure yourself a second date?
  
  
• Do you want to know what girls really mean when they use the 10 common expressions?
  
  
• Do you know why women go for "Bad Boys"? Do you want to know how you can be a good "Bad Boy"?
  
  
• Do you know what are her innermost desires? Do you want to know how to make your woman's fantasies come true?
  
  
• You need not have to search further - the Answers to all your questions about women's sexuality are all right here!
  
  
• Do you know the 30 things you must do to seduce a woman?
  
  
• Do you want to know 50 ways to spice up your dull sex life?
  
  
• Do you want to know what your woman expect from marriage? Do you know the 30 ways to ensure things stay interesting between you and your spouse?
  
  
• Common relationships problems and how to deal with them
  
  
• Do you know the 20 things you should NEVER say to a girl?
  
  
• Do you know what are the 30 things you don't generally say ? but that she DESPERATELY wants to hear?
  
  
• 50 surprising secrets about girls that you may not know
  
  

Download 500 Secrets About Girls Every Guy Should Know!