
Love Note for Singles Only
by
The beginning of the journey from the head to the heart is only 'a decision to begin it' away. It begins when you become curious enough to self-inquire; to dig deep enough to discover what is in your heart; to discover what you didn't know you didn't know! Your heart will become open, active and brave. Your head makes up things based upon what you already know. Often those are the things that haven't worked very well for you in the past. Often that's what keeps you stuck. It would have you think this journey is on a worrisome and fearful path. The heart explores new ways of being. It helps you discover the possibility that love is. When love speaks from the heart, it gets your undivided attention with words of encouragement, understanding, courage, confidence and acceptance. You take notice. Your head speaks out of both sides of its mouth. Commitment in a relationship demands dependability. Your head wobbles from one idea to another, with no particular focus. It can come up with more reasons 'not to' than it can good reasons to take the leap with faith and know you will be okay. It makes up fear so it doesn't have to risk taking the leap into the unknown. Part of the problem is it thinks it knows the unknown and it cannot know. Words from the heart might sound like this: "Remember to put me first! I am love. I will never let you down." "Listen to me! I will tell you when it's time to take the big step. I know you are still afraid. To step over into love, you must first walk through your fear. You can do it if you take my lead." "You are loving you more now. That's good. You are in process and being prepared to be somebody's 'favorite person to love.' Patience. This takes time. Soon you will be ready." "You are beginning to discover genuine intimacy with yourself. Self-intimacy is good. Have patience. You're getting to know you better. Take it slow and steady. Easy now. You're doing very well." "Remember, I am love. When you are ready to listen I will speak and you will know it's me speaking and you will know it's time." How can you be sure you are really ready for a new relationship? In your heart you will know it's time when you no longer feel the need to be in a relationship. . . and you are comfortable with that idea. That kind of love for yourself lights your heart-light. It makes you visible to others who have similar feelings. Your heart-light is loves' subtle, yet silent signal. It lights the path to love. Proudly and fearlessly let it shine. The next seemingly logical dilemma is: Where do I look? That's your head talking again. Do life! Live fully! Be wherever you show up! Really be who you are wherever you go. Make certain your 'best foot forward' is really who you are and not someone you think someone else thinks you should be. "Where do I look?" comes from fear. It makes you think that you need to be looking. It is not necessary to look. Only pay attention. Put yourself in loves' way. Be active where other people are. Remember: Like attracts like! Let your heart-light shine. You won't find him or her. . . you will find each other. When need disappears, choice shows up! Not needing to be in a relationship with someone creates the freedom to choose to be in a relationship with someone. In your heart you will know. . . it's time. When you learn to really love yourself, your energy is focused on love not fear, which often appears as desperation. Redirect your energy to listen to the healthy and truthful messages of the heart. Thus begins the journey from the head to the heart. Only trust your heart! It only and always tells the truth!
Perhaps that is why it is important to have a great relationship with ourselves. When we can do a great relationship with ourselves, we can do a great relationship with two people. When we reach that place, we can have a great relationship with someone else because we already know how to be in a great relationship. . . with ourselves! ©MCMXCIX Show All Articles By Larry James
©MCMXCIX Larry James. Reprinted with permission. ~ This article is adapted from Larry's books,
"LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing," "How to Really Love the One You're With: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship" and "Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers." (Career Assurance Press). Author Larry James is also a professional speaker. He presents "Relationship Enrichment LoveShops" nationally for singles and couples. Larry is on staff with Dr. John Gray, Ph.D. For information or to order a personally autographed book call: 800 725-9223.CelebrateLove.com, P.O. Box 12695, Scottsdale, AZ 85267-2695. WebSite: CelebrateLove.com See a Review of Larry's books: How to Really Love the One You're with!: Affirmative Guidelines for a Healthy Love Relationship LoveNotes for Lovers: Words That Make Music for Two Hearts Dancing Red Hot LoveNotes for Lovers: The Importance of Great Sexual Communication and Other Essentials for Extraordinary Hot Sex
Back To Article IndexHow to Find the Man of Your Dreams
How long have you been waiting for your dream man to show up in your life? How long have you been waiting for love to find you? If you're like most women, from the time you were old enough to think, you've dreamed that one day your Prince Charming would come along -- and he would sweep you off your feet, and you'd live happily ever after, right? But it hasn't happened -- and you're still waiting, aren't you? Chances are, you've begun to ask yourself, 'What's wrong with me? Why can't I find a wonderful man who wants to marry me?' You're not alone. There are countless women who are in the same boat as you. It doesn't matter whether you're a single woman who's never been married, or a divorced or widowed woman who wishes to remarry. Neither does it matter whether you're tall or short, shy or outgoing, thin or heavy, what your skin color is, whether you have children or not, or what part of the country (or the world) you live in. It also makes no difference how many times you've tried to find the right man and failed. When you follow this proven plan exactly as prescribed, you cannot fail to get the man of your dreams -- and more importantly, have a long-lasting and blissful relationship with him. The No. 1 Reason Why You Have Not Been Able to Get the Man of Your Dreams is... ...you have an ineffective pattern regarding your relationships with men. Patterns don't lie. A pattern is a combination of behaviors, thoughts, emotions, actions, qualities and tendencies forming a consistent arrangement that generally brings about a predictable result. Just as there is a pattern in some teenagers that causes them to consume alcohol; a pattern in career people that causes them to find only bad jobs; a pattern that causes individuals to have anxiety in public speaking; so too, is there a pattern that causes women to be unsuccessful at finding their dream man or an ideal mate. This pattern, which runs on auto-pilot, usually beneath the radar of your awareness, makes you unconsciously sabotage your deepest desire to find love. The good news is that once you identify the ineffective pattern and replace it with an effective one, there is a very high probability that you will find, attract and have a successful relationship with the man of your dreams. Yes -- believe it or not, it's as simple as that! The problem that most single women have is that they don't know the difference between an effective pattern regarding relationships and an ineffective, self-sabotaging pattern. In fact, most women don't even know that they have a pattern in the first place! If you'd rather do it the old-fashioned way and wait for him to show up, then prepare yourself for a long wait. But if you'd rather pursue your dream man the way you pursue any worthwhile goal in your life -- that is, by following a step-by-step proven plan, then you simply cannot be without How to Find the Man of Your Dreams. Can you afford to waste any more time getting less than the complete happiness you deserve? |
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