1. Your mother lives in her own house, not at yours (unless you are taking care of her of course). Your partner is NOT your Mom and is not responsible to help you remember what it takes to keep harmony and peace in your relationship. (Reminding you about her birthday or that its trash day and you agreed to take it out is something you can do if you make a decision to; put your dirty socks and boxer/briefs in the hamper; kissing her daily; etc. are also things you can do on yourself when you make a decision it's important.)

2." Housework" is not just for women. You can learn how to do laundry, vacuum the house and wash the dishes if you haven't learned in the past.

3.Not being the first to say I love you on a regular basis.

4. Storming out of an argument without an agreement to at least come back later for resolution

5. Not listening too and supporting your partner's ideas even if you don't believe in them.

6. Thinking everything is about you and for you. Basically being selfish in a relationship.

7. Not investing enough time in your relationship.

8. Constantly talking smack about her family members. You knew who they were before you became involved with her and whether you like it or not, they are there to stay. Please remember that blood is thicker than water. That doesn't mean you can't voice an opinion occasionally, it just means don't constantly rail on her family even if you are right. You'll plant a seed in her that may grow into a thorn bush.

9. Not taking your time in bed with her to allow her to grab a piece of heaven. As many books, material and conversations there are about sexual relations, many men still do not get it. It's not about the orgasm; those are cheap although very enjoyable. We can obtain an orgasm all by ourselves. It's about the process of getting there. Put it this way. You've waited all week to go to your favorite hockey, football or baseball game. The anticipation and excitement about getting in your car, arriving at the park and sitting down with a hot dog and a coke to watch your favorite players duke it out against their arch enemies has been worth the wait. Just before you walk into the stadium, someone pulls you aside and tells you the outcome in less than ten minutes. Now you know who scored what-when and the play by play action before the game started. Is the thrill still there? No. Why be at the game at all? It takes the enjoyment, anxious moments and curiosity out of the pleasure of watching the outcome doesn't it? If you rush your partner to an orgasm or think because you had an orgasm she is satisfied too, you've stolen the thunder of the game for her and the thrill is gone. Continue to do this and she will either lose interest in you sexually or you will lose the game and be traded for another player.

10. Not learning to be emotionally available. (We know you don't think or behave in the same manner we do so don't worry! Women aren't asking you to stop being a man, just talk about who you are, where you came from, past history and future dreams.)

©2006 Jaci Rae

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