Perhaps you've heard of a man named Paul Janka. He's the guy who claims to have gone from a nerdy, 20-year-old virgin to having bedded hundreds of women in a few short years by carpet bombing New York with aggressive sexual advances. His method for getting women into bed works, it's been working for generations of frat boys: get a girl super drunk, and she might sleep with you. Do this on a daily basis, and you could probably end up having a lot of sex. But is it good sex?

Banging a bunch of drunk chicks is child's play. If all you're looking for is a place to put your penis, stay home and masturbate. It's cheaper than dropping all your cash on $10 cocktails to help some girl hate herself in the morning. Guys like Paul Janka are leg-humping puppies, and you want to run with the big dogs.

Talking to a woman is a good start. As in, have an actual conversation. This is just as important after twenty years of marriage as it is on the first date. Really hearing what a woman tells you helps you to figure out what she likes and why, which helps you figure out what she likes and why in the bedroom. If you're just staring at her breasts and ordering Captain and diets, you may miss the part where she's a devout Catholic and doesn't believe in sex before marriage. Or worse, you may miss the part where she was a Human Sexuality major and once dated a girl. Plus, women are more turned on by a guy who is witty and charming than tall, dark, and handsome. Just ask Lyle Lovett, Tom Green, or David Spade. They've all had sex with your dream girls...a bunch of times.

When you get into the bedroom, remember that there is another human involved. Not appreciating the living, breathing, orgasm having being under you is about like having sex with a blow-up doll, just warmer. Sure, putting your penis in someone, pumping three times, then blowing your load is fun, but having to apologize afterward isn't. Be cognizant of the woman with you, the way she smells, the way she feels, and how she reacts to your touch. Listen to what she tells you. It not only is pleasurable for her, but it amplifies your own sexual gratification exponentially.

There you go. It's not so difficult to make love like a man. Women aren't trying to hide what they like, you just have to hear what they're saying. Or would you rather listen to some guy who was a virgin until he was twenty?

©2010 Michael Webb

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