Adult Children Come Home to Heal
by
Should you let an adult child come home again? Parents send their nearly grown children out to conquer the world and sometimes they bounce right back home. A parent's goal is to teach their child to survive the best and the worst that life has to offer. Most young people are able to maintain a level of existence, sobriety and relationships that sustain them until they really know who they are and what they want to do with their lives. However, sometimes life throws them a curve and they falter. Circumstances can hurt them, even bring them to their knees. A devastating break-up with a lover, flunking their first semester, an unexpected death of a best friend, or getting fired from his or her first real job can knock your child out of the game and take months to a year to recover. Did you keep their childhood bedroom just the same? Perhaps this is the time to open the shades and prepare for a wounded visitor. Make it clear that the invitation is temporary but open your door widely and let them come home again. As irritating as they are to you and your spouse, remember that your little habits will irritate them, too. As they begin to recover their sea legs, they will want the freedom of their own place ASAP. If you want to encourages them to leave quickly after a few weeks recovery, begin to talk endlessly about developing a strong work ethic and new disciplined habits in place of blaming others for their situation or procrastination. Hopefully, they will soon be out seeking new adventures. Help them improve their diet and sleep patterns. Try including fish oil and B vitamins daily to help them recharge their nerves and bodies. Less coffee and colas and more vegetables will help them with their mood. If your child seems to be getting worse or rarely leaves the house, antidepressants may be indicated. Get medical help immediately if your child seems despondent or suicidal. Being mom or dad again may even heal your empty nest pain. Give them a safe haven for a little while away from the pressures of living fast and competitively. Soon, they will try to fly again, this time a little wiser, a little stronger and a bit more ready. Oh, and don't redecorate that room just yet. They may be back. 
Dr. Molly Barrow holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology and is the author of the new book, "Matchlines: A Revolutionary New Way of Looking at Relationships and Making the Right Choices in Love," ISBN 159507158X. She is an authority on relationship and psychological topics; a member of the American Psychological Association, Screen Actors Guild, and Author's Guild and is a licensed mental health counselor. Dr. Molly has appeared as an expert in the film, My Suicide, documentaries Ready to Explode and KTLA Impact, NBC news, PBS In Focus, WBZT talk radio and in O Magazine, Psychology Today, Newsday, The Nest, MSN.com, Yahoo, Match.com, N Magazine, Women's Health, Women's World and Shrink About This columnist for Scripps newspapers and Menstuff. To purchase Matchlines book please visit: http://www.askdrmolly.com. To read Dr. Molly Barrow daily blog: http://www.DrMollyBarrow.com.
©2007
Back To Article IndexThe Greatest Parenting Secret In History
How much is it worth to you NOT to be saying "Clean up your room . . ." for the next 18 years? How many mothers do you know who are still telling their kids at 16 or 17 to clean up their rooms or pick up after themselves? How much is a peaceful home and peaceful relationships with your children worth? Think that's difficult to do? It's not! Kids have the capacity to learn and understand some pretty big concepts, like INTEGRITY. Do you know how to teach that? To get it across to them, to actually INSTILL it in their hearts so that it becomes their own inner star that guides them? How do you teach your children to have emotional balance? A good heart? How do you teach good character qualities and life principles to your children and instill it deep in their hearts? It's really not as hard as you may think. Kids love it, no, change that to . . . they are hungry for it! The Secret waits for you here |
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Raise Your Kids Right the First Time AroundIt's every parent's desire to see their children grow up to be well adjusted and happy individuals. Our children's future happiness depends on how well they are able to learn life skills as they grow up. We have to take on the role of teacher and we need to be very good at it. Raise Your Kids Right the First Time Around is an excellent resource to help you ensure your children have a happy and fruitful life. You owe it to your children to read this book.
Gary Caine 
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